Ridiculosity
- This topic has 14 replies, 12 voices, and was last updated Jun 13, 2008 at 5:18 pm by
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Hey guys –
A thread on another board prompted me to start something similar here.
What’s the most ridiculous fishing story you personally have or have been told?
I was night fishing for smallmouth bass with a good friend of mine one night several years ago in August. We fished from about 9:00 PM up until about 3:30 or 4:00 in the AM. As I pulled up to the boat dock to let my friend Buck off at the dock to back the boat trailer in I heard some kind of crazy loud screaming and a bunch of shouting. I looked around but, could not see anything and the sounds were coming from behind me at a old block house, across the creek. The boat ramp is built out on the point of a creek mouth and the other side is about 200 yards away. As Buck was backing the truck down I heard the sound of gun shots! Then I saw water blowing up in front of my boat! After diving in the floor of my boat and then reaching for the old trusty 1911 car lights came on at the top of parking lot and a car came speeding down toward the ramp. As luck would have it a TVA police officer was parked back in the shadows of the parking lot looking for thugs stealing car radios. The blue lights came on and the shooting stopped as fast as it started. The officer go out and ran behind the car, drew his weapon and started barking commands over the cars loud speaker. My friend Buck had the radio turned up and was in another world. He did not even hear the shot being fired, all he saw was the TVA police officer with a weapon. Buck put his hands up and sat in the truck with the police car lights shining in his face! The shooting had stopped after about 10 seconds (seemed like 30 minutes). A few minutes later the lot was full of police officers and Buck and I filled out a lot of forms. The police went across the creek and arrested some old guy that was drunk out of his mind. He told some story about his best friend stealing this wife by means of boat. He picked her up in a bass boat and they went off down river together to live happy ever after! LOL! We went back about a month later and the old guy had got drunk and burnt his house down! I think he did his self in on that deal. Go figure!
Earlier this year, I was on my way out to a very remote lake in the White Mountains here in Arizona. This same area has reportedly made the news many times nationally for Bigfoot sightings. Unrelated to the story, but an interesting fact none the less. The body of water sits 56 miles inside a national forest, all of which is unpaved. The later 12 miles is mostly old forest road with very little travel if any. Unkempt and rocky, a hazard to anything rubber and inflatable. (Tires- guys- get your mind out of the gutter). The plan was to meet up with friends to photograph, while fishing, for a short destination piece on the water for a regional magazine. Somewhere around mile 37 or so I swerved to not hit this elk.
Please note as a disclaimer – All photos are bad, I either took these through the window of my truck or in complete disgust at the day. I recognize how poor quality they are, and apologize.While swerving, I drove smack over a football size rock. An awful hissing sound told me how bad it really was. The start of my day, was going to involve changing a tire. After digging out the jack and lifting the truck, I looked at my watch, 815am, and cracked a beer. Less than twenty seconds after my first sip, I watched my jack implode as the head slipped back down into the body. The entire truck sank 8 inches, my heart much further.
After further inspection, it was obvious that all the seals on the Jack had been blown. I had a decision to make. With a car full of gear and a cooler full of food, I could stay the night and hope someone comes by. Or hike out to an intersection that is frequently traveled by Fish and Game, and anglers alike, the downside was, according to the map, it was 15 miles from my current location. I choose the later, and after gearing up a daypack with everything I needed for a four hour hike I was off. GPS in hand, leaving a digital breadcrumb path back to my stranded vehicle in case anything happened. Close to 2:15PM I came across a Game and Fish Truck driving a lone dirt road with a very strange, UHF – like antenna on its roof. I flagged the driver down and explained my situation. He had a Hi-Lift and offered to help me out. At that moment, I marked a waypoint on the GPS, it said 11.6 miles.
During our ride back to my wounded Rover, we got to talking about his role at Arizona’s Game and Fish department. He explained to me he was a scientist who was studying wolves. The crazy antenna on he had was part of a setup to locate the collard Mexican Wolves in the area. We chatted back and forth, and he mentioned he had not made contact with the pack all day.
As we turned down the fire road four miles from my truck, the speaker attached to his CB radio made a familiar ping. Similar to old WWII movies where submarines would pick up enemy ships on their radar. The closer we got to my truck, the more pings we heard. With a sneaky suspicion of what the pings meant I finally asked him what they were.
He confirmed my fears, the closer to my truck’s locatin, the shorter the duration between pings. By the time we had pulled up to my vehicle there was a constant ‘PING’, PING, ‘PING’. His words not mine,
“Don’t worry, wolves are harmless. The pinging mean there within 500m of us, that is plenty of space.”
Why he’s trying to quell my fears, I’m thinking this guy is nuts. Wolves are harmless? Those F#ckers were hunting me. Why else would they be around my truck out here in the middle of nowhere?
Anxiously we jacked up the car, swapped in the spare and snapped one picture for memory sake.
We shook hands and parted ways. I wrote a very nice thank you letter to AZ Game and Fish, extending my gratitude to their scientist. I never did see a wolf that day. However, I swear to you at the price of burning in Hell, the cover of the local paper a week later featured an article about high school kids getting chased by wolves in the town marking the turn off from the freeway to the dirt road that I was on. A younger child was mauled less than a week later and they had to hunt most of the pack down.
It was deer season, and I had a knife. I hate to waste meat.
Translated from…
Whe’ll, it was deer season, ‘n I had my witl’n kniff, ‘n I hate to be waist’n no meat; ju heer…
I know that I’m not real good at this, but it is worth a bash…
A certain Mr. Foxworth said something about knowing how to skin road-kill and being some thing; can’t remember that something though…
Had a wild Turkey try to land on me once and had to defend myself swashbuckler style from a really pissed off goose. The police here have a list of people that take road kill deer (some of my friends) so
While not quite up to wolves and road kill casserole, the funniest thing I had fishing was when a buddy and I were fishing a small creek here in Kentucky.
We got pretty close to where the creek joins the Licking river and it started getting deep enough that we couldn’t wade.
We decided to climb out and cross a corn field back to where we put in and fish the stretch again.
The banks were very steep and very muddy.
Memorable
When I was 19 I borrowed my mothers car so a friend and I could go up to the family cottage for 3 days of fishing. About 10 minutes from the cottage, I went off the road a wee bit making a sharp left turn. Minor thing, but the shoulder was soft enough that we got stuck. By the time we walked to the nearest farm and had the farmer come back with his tractor the cops had come across the vehicle. While the farmer was moving the car the 6 inches it needed to get back on the road, the cop was grilling us about what happened. Told him I took it a little too fast, there were no skid marks nor did we hit the post lining the outside of the shoulder, but it was enough that the right wheels left the pavement and the shoulder was soft enough to get us stuck. Guess he was in a bad mood as I got hit with a Careless charge.That was Day 1. Day 2 was better. I buried a 6 inch Rapala in my hand. Rather than go directly to the hospital we decided to stop in the towns Ballet to fortify ourselves a bit first. Im sure its not every day they have patrons with Rapalas dangling from one hand.
Day 3.
My friend drove home as my left hand was throbbing and wrapped in bandages. At one point he thought it would be cool to turn the headlights off and drive down a country road. Before I could convince him to stop screwing around, he plowed into a mailbox. Fortunately it bounced of the hood, rahter than coming through the windshield. Unfortunately it left a rather large dent in the hood.The only good thing to come of that trip was that Rapala being burried in my hand. The parking at the cottage is such that you often need to squeeze between the car and gate post. I was able to convince my mother, that it was while squeezing past the front end of the car with a full tank of gas for the boat in my hands, that I hooked myself on the Rapala which had been placed on the cars hood and by doing so, dropped the full tank of gas on the hood of her car.
Under Lucky and funny
Deep into a Provincial Park I came down with severe Bronchitis (fevers well above 100) and had to be evacuated. It took a couple days but I got out and into the nearest hospital. Not sure if it was just from being in the bush and not bathing, or if the sweats from the fevers had anything to do with it, but I was loused from head to foot. Watching the nurses reactions as they tap danced on the bugs that jumped off me while they stripped me made the whole thing worthwile.Under Doh!
Not many years ago I was making final preparations on the eve of a much anticipated ice fishing trip with some friends. It was late at night, dead of winter and I was preoccupied gathering things and looking forwards to the trip.At some point I went around the main floor locking up the house then went upstairs to the computer for a final bit before intending to call it a night. 20, maybe 30 minutes later a dull thumbing sound registered through the ear phones ( so as to not wake the house). What the hell? Head phones off, sure enough someones pounding on the front door.
Peek out the window.
It’s my wife
In her birthday suitTurns out she decided to crawl into the hot tub before bed and I in my preoccupied daze locked her out…….in the buff……..in sub freezing temperatures…for about 15 minutes
🙂That was one cold night and fishing trip
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